#See #Do #Teach
#VisiblePractice #OpenScholarship #MicroScholarship
#RelaxIntoAction #RelaxBeforeAction #SoftenGroundOpenObserveBeforeResoluteAction
"See one, Do one, and Teach one" is our well known teaching mantra in healthcare ... "see Oneself mindfully - thoughts, emotions, body 1st" ... "look within, and with awareness of MYSELF first!" ... as starting point ... then when coaching someone else ... pay close attention to what the other person says, and how they say it ... (transfer to practice takeaway #1, Poh-Sun Goh, 20 April 2021 @ 4.25pm, Singapore Time).
'... human capital is the infrastructure of the 21st century ...' Rana Faroohar, 'The US infrastructure most in need of investment is human', Financial Times, 18 April 2021. Accessed on 21 April 2021.
"...3x3x3 encourages you to define three development goals, over a three-month period, engaging three other people to support you in those goals and hold you accountable ..."
above quote from article titled 'Intentional learning in practice: A 3x3x3 approach' by Lisa Christensen, Jake Gittleson, and Matthew Smith. Available at https://www.mckinsey.com/business-functions/mckinsey-accelerate/our-insights/intentional-learning-in-practice-a-3x3x3-approach (Accessed on 21 April 2021).
shared with Study Group
22 April 2021
on YouTube
Reviewing my notes from Conference 1:
#Toolbox #Toolkit #Observe #ExpandYourVessel #ShapeOfContainer #EmptyYourCup
https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/04/ontologicalcoaching-engagement.html
https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/04/listening-open-directed-frameworks.html
#Will #Skill #Matrix
#Distinctions #Coaching #Leading #Managing #Teaching #Mentoring #Negotiating #Matrix
https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/04/see-do-teach-relaxintoaction.html
https://www.mckinsey.com/business-functions/mckinsey-accelerate/our-insights/why-mentoring-matters-a-conversation-with-carlos-lejnieks
https://hbr.org/2003/12/developing-your-leadership-pipeline
Berkel, G. (2020). Learning to Negotiate. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press. doi:10.1017/9781108863599
#Will #Skill #WillSkillMatrix
#4BasicMoods #Facts #Possibility #Accept #Reject #Hope #Resentment #Matrix
http://www.newfieldinstitute.com.au/html/articles_OCCT_013.html
https://coachingleaders.co.uk/coaching-for-emotional-intelligence/
#LimbicResonance #LimbicRegulation #LimbicRevision
Identify what you want to change - Old behaviour
New behaviour
Do the new behaviour more than old behaviour.
Will be uncomfortable. Practice through resistance from Limbic system. Do it anyway.
We are wired to responds to threats (as a biological model).
Need to learn to regulate this in safe space. By focusing on limbic brain.
Breathing cools the centre part of our brain down. Cool air cools the ethmoid sinuses. Breath cools limbic system.
Limbic resonance - beta, alpha, gamma, theta - the general theory of love, when in sync, we are resonating together
Limbic regulation - I regulate myself, I regulate others (me calm, you calm)
Limbic revision
(Three R’s of the limbic brain)
Neocortex is slow
Limbic brain is slow
+ (stress triggers blood flow to limbic and primitive brain, sensory brain is ‘alive’; learning disappears)
Primitive brain is fast
#SlowDown #Mindful #Mindfulness
Slow down. Mindful. Reflective Mindfulness.
Between stimulus and response is my opportunity to PAUSE, and CHOOSE
-Victor Frankl
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
— Viktor E. Frankl
https://extension.umn.edu/two-you-video-series/space-between-stimulus-and-response#:~:text=%E2%80%9CBetween%20stimulus%20and%20response%20there,our%20growth%20and%20our%20freedom.%E2%80%9D
#Observe
Observe you state
Frame today
Decision about today
Awareness
Situational awareness
Check-in
Check-out
Reflection
Mindfulness
What are you bringing today
Look at you
The vessel
Shape of the vessel
Rather than what you drop in vessel
#Silence
‘Become comfortable with … silence’
What is keeping me from reaching out … taking action ….. habits, patterns
https://www.productiveandfree.com/blog/31-habit-quotes
#Focus #Priorities #Habits
What are all the things you care about? Share with partner?
Tell me more about why you care about this?
Don’t judge. Comment. Keep asking. And listening.
8 minutes each.
Am I taking care about what I care about?
That I am taking care of.
With previous resources of time and energy.
O-A-R model
What do I care about?
Am I taking care of what I most care about?
Are my actions aligned with what I care about?
What we care about gives us meaning, aliveness and connection.
Otherwise connected.
Drift through life. Or be intentional and design about this.
Alignment.
Connecting.
Engagement.
Have to keep care conversation ongoing. And alive.
#RegularPractice
Intensity of experience or practice will thicken the neural bundle.
Memory - Somatic and Episodic (somatic memory, or repetition - again and again and again)
Mood (s)
Moods are contagious
Limbic regulation
The thicker the bundle pulls the other mood to it (anger, peace etc, strongest emotion moves people, audience to it)
Intensity of experience or practice will thicken the neural bundle.
Gratitude - scale 1 to 10, where are you right now?
Just because
#Leadership
Did not need world to change anything … pull world into you.
When you feel good … you will pull people into you
Limbic revision
Gratitude self perpetuates … through movement …. Resonate out ….. can pull people into us …. Do not need to do anything to pull people into us …. Locus of control is within us
This is called leadership … the act of Leadership … because of who is you and what you are radiating
#SpeechActs #IntoAction
A great offer speaks into what is missing in other people, communities …. !!!
Powerful offers are made when they speak into the breaks in other people! Lands into what other people care about !!!
Where does this show up linguistically?
Unless something manifests in the world, it does not count?
What I care about must be experienced in the world !!
What is my offer !! (Speech acts) to the world??
#Roles #WhoAmI?
Strip away titles, position
Who am I?
Exercise … what is my personal offer to the world … if I am no longer here … what is, or would be missing the world …. Who would miss me …..
While song ‘The Gift You Are’ by John Denver is playing in background
#UniqueOffer #PersonalBackground
We coach from our wounds
Our value offering
Uniquely
#Requests #ConditionsOfSatisfaction
Don’t go around resenting others for not fulfilling our expectations for what we did not request
Request made with enough details to allow its fulfilment to our satisfaction
Specifically articulate conditions for satisfaction
Otherwise leads to organisational waste
#OwningTheRequest #Listener #MessageReceived?
Owning the request … I need this done
Is the listener present? Did the request get received? Hearing request?
Listener must be able to, with capacity (including time), and competence to fulfil request
'If your listener cannot say no … this is slavery'
What do I need to feel satisfied … this is huge ! Spoken and unspoken.
#Promises
Promises - our job is to MANAGE our promises
Basically four responses.
Yes. No. Negotiate. Get back to you (commit to respond in future)
What is my promise to my organisation
What am I paid for
Look at promises I have committed to - personally and professionally.
#WorkLifeBalance #Promises #AtWork #AtHome #ToMyself
Look at myself
Who am I when making request … my vessel … what do I want to look like
Who can I make request to
How about promises?
Where can I say no? Where cannot I say no? Explore ball of string. Examine words. Beliefs. What do I say. What do I hear. Tell me more about this. Stories and reasons.
When you say yes in office, you are saying no at home. To your family. To yourself.
Where can you say yes.
Where can you say no.
Work - Life balance. There is only one life. There is nothing to balance.
Promises at work, home, personally.
'...when most Parisians were not eating, they were either thinking or talking about food...fire, food and cooking feature often in the work of Claude Levi-Strauss...'Cooking,' Levi-Strauss explained, 'is a language through which society unconsciously reveals its structure...' and
'All cultures have to manage this struggle between nature and culture,' he (Levi-Strauss) wrote. 'Nature ("raw") is associated with instinct and the body, while culture ("cooked") is associated with reason and the mind, among other things.'
above two quotes from Chapter 4, Fire's Other Gifts
in 'Work - A History of How We Spend Our Time by James Suzman', page 117 and page 119 (physical copy read on 22 April 2021).
What is the price paid?
Confidence
#SpeechActsApplied #Examples #Declarations
'Thank you' - is a declaration, that my condition for satisfaction has been met.
'You are welcome' - I acknowledge your declaration. We are done.
'I am sorry' - 'I apologise' - link to image [superhero]
'Yes' - 'No'
I forgive you
I forgive myself
Block
Anchor to past
Stop moving on
You can declare and decide that we will not continue our relationship in the future.
Your unwillingness to forgive keeps you anchored to event or the past.
#Declarations #Moods #Emotions #BodyPositions #Somatics
Declarations and Habits come with different moods, emotions and body positions
#MyRoles #MyPurpose #MyMission
