Friday, 5 November 2021

#CoachingConversation(s) - #Lifestages #Tasks #Milestones #Responsibilities #Growth

#CoachingConversation(s) - #Lifestages #Tasks #Milestones #Responsibilities #Growth

Poh-Sun Goh

6 November 2021, 0622am, Singapore Time


In broad terms, we can observe three life stages, from birth, to death. This starting (birth) and end point (death) are immutable. 

In the first life stage, after birth, as human beings, we are dependent, progressively grow and develop physically, mentally, and emotionally; within a family/community setting. [We will leave aside for future exploration scenarios where this ideal state is disrupted, in settings of war, conflict, being orphaned, etc]. We transition from family, through formal education, being progressively socialised. At some point, after exploring and discovering one's strengths and interests, preparing to live independently, make a living (including developing and training to perform socially and economically valuable and value-add roles), and progressively finding purpose and meaning, to build a personal and professional identity - this task taking center stage (i.e. who are you/am I? Being able to honestly answer this question, informed by experience, guided training, personal reflection and insight, and coaching).

In the second life stage, we take on individual and additional social responsibilities - at 'work', with our social networks, and for many of us, our own family; including its attendant financial, physical, mental, emotional, social and existential/spiritual challenges (to continue to grow and develop), and opportunities (to continue to grow and develop). A learning and growth mindset, informal and formal learning and training, personal reflection with openness, and honesty, informed personal awareness and observation [of results and outcomes], feedback (which is unbiased, honest and for us/given with our interest in mind) and coaching are all enablers.

In the third and final life stage, as we progressively relinquish our financial, 'work' and 'family' responsibilities, there will be an increasing challenge to re-examine ideas of personal identity, life meaning and purpose, and exploration of roles in life, and living, beyond traditional ideas of 'work' and 'family'. Ideally, this individual, and internal 'work' and exploration is guided and driven by deep personal insight, on a foundation of honesty, openness, will to grow and learn, flexibility, adaptability and anchored by stability (physical, mental and emotional; not to mention spiritual and existential 'wisdom') and resoluteness.

Coaching conversations can help.

Coaching Emotions; Empathy, Sympathy and Compassion; Limbic Resonance; Affective Leadership

Google search for 'emotional coaching'

https://www.gottman.com/blog/an-introduction-to-emotion-coaching/


Google search for 'coaching for emotional intelligence'

https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/2019/12/20/why-coaching-is-all-about-emotional-intelligence/?sh=6ca7cd714e0a

https://coachingfederation.org/blog/work-with-emotional-intelligence

https://appliedsportpsych.org/resources/resources-for-coaches/improved-coaching-through-emotional-intelligence/

https://believeperform.com/how-emotional-intelligence-can-enhance-coaching-practices/

https://positivepsychology.com/coach-emotional-intelligence/

https://coachcampus.com/coach-portfolios/research-papers/emotional-intelligence-coaching/


Google search for compassion vs empathy vs sympathy

https://compassionit.com/2017/08/27/empathy-sympathy-and-compassion-whats-the-difference/

https://chopra.com/articles/whats-the-difference-between-empathy-sympathy-and-compassion

Jeffrey D. Empathy, sympathy and compassion in healthcare: Is there a problem? Is there a difference? Does it matter? Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine. 2016;109(12):446-452. doi:10.1177/0141076816680120 https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/0141076816680120


https://lynboyer.net/emotional-intelligence-3/what-is-limbic-resonance-and-how-can-leaders-use-it-2.html 

https://lynboyer.net/leadership-presence/executive-presence-in-the-extremes.html

https://lynboyer.net/connect-affective-leadership℠-for-effective-results

Wednesday, 3 November 2021

Coaching Conversation(s) - Small Daily Steps, Daily Habits, Strong Effects, Significant Impact

Coaching Conversation (s) - Small Daily Steps, Daily Habits, Strong Effects, Significant Impact

Poh-Sun Goh, 4 November 2021, 0603am

Consider, sleeping a little earlier, a little longer. To wake up fresher. More rested. To build the foundation for the rest of the stay. Begin your day by sleeping well. Longer. 

Drink more water. First thing in the morning.

Eat consciously. Enough. Watch timing. To perform better.

Get fitter. Keep fit. Build 'muscle' - physical, mental, emotional, spiritual. 

'Read'. Learn something new. Daily. To start your day. To widen your perspective. See with 'new' eyes. See more. Deeper. 

'Reflect'. Know yourself. Know the world. About life. A little better. Every day. Do this at the beginning, and end of each day.

Know why. A little better. A little deeper. Each day. What gives you joy. Happiness. Meaning. Purpose. Before considering what and how.

Learning. Sharing. Giving back. Serving. Helping others. Adding value.

Coaching conversations can help.



Always remember that the future comes one day at a time. - Dean Acheson

Its the little details that are vital. Little things make big things happen. - John Wooden

Nothing is particularly hard if you divide it into small jobs. - Henry Ford

Men stumble over pebbles, never over mountains. - H. Emilie Cady

Step by step. I can't think of any other way of accomplishing anything. - Michael Jordan

Be master of your petty annoyances and conserve your energies for the big, worthwhile things. It isn't the mountain ahead that wears you out, it's the grain of sand in your shoe. - Robert Service

The world is not moved only by the mighty shoves of the heroes, but also by the aggregate of the tiny pushes of each honest worker. - Helen Keller


The man who removes a mountain begins by carrying away small stones. - Chinese Proverb

Be not afraid of growing slowly, be afraid only of standing still. - Chinese proverb

Great things are done by a series of small things brought together. - Vincent Van Gogh

Success is the sum of small efforts repeated day in and day out. - Robert Collier

We cannot all do great things, but we can do small things with great love. - Mother Teresa

Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can. - Arthur Ashe

Active Reading, Scribbling notes in margins, Blogging

https://vstorereading.com/how-scribbling-in-the-margins-transformed-my-reading/ 


Mystic Microsoft: A Journey of Transformation in the Halls of High Technology By Kraig Brockschmidt (Google Books)


https://www.amazon.com/Mystic-Microsoft-Journey-Transformation-Technology/dp/1365297810


https://www.bbc.com/reel/video/p09qwdp6/playing-with-fire-the-millennial-movement-to-quit-work


https://www.ourrichjourney.com/blog/yolo-and-the-fire-movement-why-it-doesnt-work-yet


https://investmentmoats.com/financial-independence/yolo-lifestyle-slow-fi/


Big History

https://www.ted.com/talks/david_christian_the_history_of_our_world_in_18_minutes


From Black Land To Fifth Sun: The Science Of Sacred Sites by Brain Fagan


From Black Land to Fifth Sun: The Science of Sacred Sites. Brian Fagan (book review)


"Sleep is your superpower ..."

https://www.ted.com/talks/matt_walker_sleep_is_your_superpower?language=en 


Matthew Walker: Why Is It Essential To Make Time For Sleep?


https://news.berkeley.edu/2019/05/13/walker-tedtalk/


https://news.berkeley.edu/2018/08/14/sleep-viral-loneliness/


https://news.berkeley.edu/2017/10/17/whywesleep/


https://www.gatesnotes.com/Books/Why-We-Sleep


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matthew_Walker_(scientist)


https://cnalifestyle.channelnewsasia.com/wellness/the-pandemic-messed-with-your-sleep-here-s-how-to-feel-rested-again-249736


https://www.channelnewsasia.com/commentary/sleep-loss-overworked-healthcare-paramedic-empathy-2277546


https://cnalifestyle.channelnewsasia.com/wellness/you-can-break-the-cycle-of-insomnia-without-long-term-medication-187146


https://cnalifestyle.channelnewsasia.com/wellness/coffee-tiredness-sleep-279031


https://cnalifestyle.channelnewsasia.com/wellness/singapore-most-fatigued-country-world-we-are-tired-278311


https://www.cdc.gov/niosh/work-hour-training-for-nurses/longhours/mod2/11.html


https://www.livescience.com/5269-study-sleepy.html


https://www.sciencealert.com/humans-used-to-sleep-in-two-shifts-maybe-we-should-again


Cousins, J.N., Leong, R.L.F., Jamaluddin, S.A. et al. Splitting sleep between the night and a daytime nap reduces homeostatic sleep pressure and enhances long-term memory. Sci Rep 11, 5275 (2021). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41598-021-84625-8 https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-021-84625-8


Fang, Z., & Rao, H. (2017). Imaging homeostatic sleep pressure and circadian rhythm in the human brain. Journal of thoracic disease, 9(5), E495–E498. https://doi.org/10.21037/jtd.2017.03.168

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5465131/


https://www.sleepfoundation.org/circadian-rhythm/sleep-drive-and-your-body-clock

Tuesday, 2 November 2021