#Listening #BeingHeard #FeelBeingHeard

The Art of Listening | Simon Sinek (YouTube)

Kriz, T. D., Kluger, A. N., & Lyddy, C. J. (2021). Feeling Heard: Experiences of Listening (or Not) at Work. Frontiers in psychology, 12, 659087. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.659087

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8350774/

https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.659087/full

https://ssir.org/articles/entry/howandwhy_to_listen_until_someone_feels_heard

https://www.theemotionmachine.com/the-power-of-being-heard/

https://hbr.org/1957/09/listening-to-people

https://skillpath.com/blog/how-to-make-someone-feel-heard-saying-the-right-thing-when-listening-

https://www.psychologytoday.com/sg/blog/talking-emotion/201911/hearing-and-being-heard

https://www.theschooloflife.com/thebookoflife/why-we-need-to-feel-heard/

https://robertmundle.com/what-does-it-feel-like-when-someone-really-listens-to-you/

Listen if you want to be heard. — John Wooden

Medicine is learned by the bedside and not in the classroom.

Let not your conceptions of disease come from words heard in the lecture room or read from the book. See, and then reason and compare and control. But see first. — William Osler

https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/news/articles/a-mission-to-reinvigorate-bedside-medicine#:~:text=%E2%80%9CMedicine%20is%20learned%20by%20the,But%20see%20first.%E2%80%9D

Peters, M., & Ten Cate, O. (2014). Bedside teaching in medical education: a literature review. Perspectives on medical education, 3(2), 76–88. https://doi.org/10.1007/s40037-013-0083-y

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3976479/

https://www.harvardmacy.org/index.php/hmi/bedside-teaching-in-person-and-on-screen-a-tale-of-two-techniques

#Coaching-#Healthcare, #Interviewing-#Conversations (BBC, NYTimes)

Shorey S, Ang E, Chua YX, Goh PS. (2021). Coaching interventions among healthcare students in tertiary education to improve mental well-being: A mixed studies review. Nurse Education Today. Available online 16 November 2021,  In Press, Journal Pre-proof. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.nedt.2021.105222

BBC World Service - The Conversation

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-ezra-klein-show/id1548604447

This-Too-Shall-Pass, Living-with-COVID-19, Seasons-Cycles, Unplug-PowerDown-SwitchOff

https://www.straitstimes.com/opinion/living-with-covid-19-coming-to-grips-with-our-anger-and-angst 

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/06/crackingthecodeoflife-lifemeaning.html

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/11/last-lecture-series-top-10-life-lessons.html

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/11/coaching-conversations-mindset-habits.html

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/10/resilience-switchoff-powerdown.html

https://www.bbc.com/culture/article/20211109-stunning-cabins-and-hideaways-around-the-world

https://www.bbc.com/reel/video/p0b373r6/an-eastern-perspective-on-the-meaning-of-life

https://www.straitstimes.com/asia/speaking-of-asia-podcast-will-immigrants-really-define-our-destiny

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/10/weekday-weekend-work-leisure-need-to.html

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/01/seasons-cycles.html

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/10/unplugging.html

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/05/buildingemotionalrange.html

#Conversations-to-#Connect #Conversations-to-#Coach

https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20211109-what-we-get-wrong-about-conversations 

https://theprofessionaldevelopmentgroup.com/article/2011-11/conversations-connect

https://strivewithme.com/7-tips-to-improve-your-conversations-and-connect-with-others/

https://focusequip.org/deeper-conversations-how-to-connect-with-others/

https://www.counselingrecovery.com/blog-san-jose/7-tips-for-healthy-conversations

https://medium.com/illumination/connecting-conversations-75cd2e67f34f

https://transformleaders.tv/five-cs-of-great-coaching-conversations/

'Coaching is a Guided Conversation'

Coaching skills demonstration (YouTube)

Great Questions to Use When Coaching Someone (YouTube)

Effective Coaching Conversations: Chapter 2 How we influence (YouTube)

Effective Coaching Conversations: Chapter 8 complete demonstration of The Coaching Path (YouTube)

How to Have Effective Coaching Conversations (YouTube)

Last Lecture (Series) - Top 10 Life Lessons

Top 10 Life Lessons (Last Lecture Series) (YouTube - Stanford Graduate School of Business)

'Life has a lot of chapters. The story is still being written...' 

'Life is an endless unfolding, and if we wish it to be, an endless process of self-discovery, an endless and unpredictable dialogue between our own potentialities and the life situations in which we find ourselves. By potentialities I mean not just performance gifts but the full range of one's capacities for learning, sensing, wondering, understanding, loving and aspiring...'

'You have to build meaning into your life, and you build it through your commitments - whether to your religion, to an ethical order as you conceived it, to your life's work, to loved ones, to your fellow humans. Young people run around searching for identity, but it isn't handed out free any more - not in this transient, rootless, pluralistic society. Your identity is what you've committed yourself to.'

- above quoted remarks by John W. Gardner (at age 77), on 'self-renewal', during Stanford Graduate School of Business reunion event (1989, see link below)

http://www.lisbonne.com/john_gardner.html

https://news.stanford.edu/thedish/2015/01/08/life-lessons-from-the-late-john-w-gardner-2/

https://ssir.org/books/reviews/entry/self-renewal_john_w_gardner

Stanford Graduate School of Business (YouTube)

#Coaching Conversations - #Mindset, #Habits, #Practices

Coaching Conversations - Mindset, Habits, Practices

Poh-Sun Goh

11 November 2021 0525am

Embodying a  growth mindset, and forward looking positive orientation is key.

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/11/last-lecture-series-top-10-life-lessons.html

'Life has a lot of chapters. The story is still being written.' 

'You have to build meaning into your life, and you build it through your commitments ... Your identity is what you've committed yourself to.'

- above quoted remarks by John W. Gardner (at age 77), on 'self-renewal', during Stanford Graduate School of Business reunion event (1989, see link below)

http://www.lisbonne.com/john_gardner.html

Will, before Skill(ing) up.

Know yourself, what you enjoy doing, find easy to do, and therefore are happy doing, and so doing adds value (and gives value to others) and is valued - ‘applied’ ikigai

Live (fully) in each moment - ‘applied’ ichi-go ichi-e

Daily habits, and practices will define and shape your life journey.

Take one step at a time. Regularly. Cumulatively. With awareness. Observation. Purposefully. Informed. And always being honest with yourself.

Coaching can help.

#KnowYourself and #HowOthersSeeYou #CoachingCanHelp

Know yourself, and how Others see you

The most difficult thing in life is to know yourself. - Thales

Know yourself to improve yourself. - Auguste Comte

“O, wad some Power the giftie gie us

To see oursels as others see us!

It wad frae monie a blunder free us,

An' foolish notion.”

- Robert Burns

O wad some Pow'r the giftie gie us; To see oursels as ithers see us! (Oh, would some Power give us the gift; To see ourselves as others see us!)

- The great Scots poet Robbie Burns wrote these words in the final stanza of To A Louse : On Seeing One On A Lady's Bonnet, At Church.

https://hbr.org/2011/09/to-see-yourself-as-others-see.html

Coaching can help. 

#WorkLIfeHarmony #WorkLifeBalance

https://www.lifehack.org/837848/ditch-work-life-balance-and-embrace-work-life-harmony

https://online.maryville.edu/blog/work-life-balance-vs-harmony/

https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbeshumanresourcescouncil/2020/11/13/work-life-balance-is-over-lets-talk-about-work-life-harmony/?sh=5d06a5b75b48

https://medium.com/@katemccready/work-life-balance-vs-work-life-harmony-ea23ba05e279

https://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/10-simple-ways-to-find-balance-and-get-your-life-back.html

#CoachingConversations - #Identity (#WhoAmI?, #WhoDoIWantToBecome?), #Choices (#HowDoIChooseToSpendMyTime?), #Community (#WhoDoIChooseToSpendMyTimeWith?), #Meaning+#Purpose (#WhyAmIHere? #WhatIsMyLifeMeaning+Purpose?

#CoachingConversations - #Identity (#WhoAmI?, #WhoDoIWantToBecome?), 

-#Choices (#HowDoIChooseToSpendMyTime?), 

-#Community (#WhoDoIChooseToSpendMyTimeWith?), 

-#Meaning+#Purpose (#WhyAmIHere? #WhatIsMyLifeMeaning+Purpose?

Poh-Sun Goh, 8 November 2021, 0348am, Singapore Time

What do you choose to automate? Make habitual? Daily routines? (e.g. Sleep, Water, Nutrition, Exercise, Reading, Learning, Growing, Social Networks-Communities you belong to, Family)

What do you choose to work on? Work at?

Who do you choose to become?

What spaces and settings do you choose to 'live' in, spend time in? (e.g. home?, where do you 'live'? work? study?, socialise?, play?, relax?)

What do you choose to be open to? Allow to happen? Explore? (e.g. Social encounters, Intellectual and Physical Travel)

Need to, Have to Want to - Cycles of Independent and Dependent Living, Informed by Continuous Learning, Training, Experience, Insight, Coaching and infused with the spirit of Ikigai and Ichi-go Ichi-e

Need to, Have to and Want to - Cycles of Independent and Dependent living from Poh-Sun Goh

Google image search for 'ikigai'

https://www.forbes.com/sites/chrismyers/2018/02/23/how-to-find-your-ikigai-and-transform-your-outlook-on-life-and-business/?sh=1359785b2ed4

https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2017/08/is-this-japanese-concept-the-secret-to-a-long-life/

Google image search for 'ichi-go ichi-e'

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ichi-go_ichi-e

https://medium.com/@michellemcfadyen68/ichigo-ichie-lets-go-moment-hunting-9660dbc269ca

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/11/coachingconversations-lifestages-tasks.html

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/11/dailyroutines.html 

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/10/managing-life-transitions-chambered.html

#DailyRoutines

https://jamesclear.com/daily-routines-writers

https://balancethegrind.co/daily-routines/ernest-hemingway-daily-routine/

https://medium.com/the-mission/the-daily-routine-of-20-famous-writers-and-how-you-can-use-them-to-succeed-1603f52fbb77

https://www.cnbc.com/2017/02/07/daily-routines-of-tesla-mozart-hemingway-and-more.html

https://www.businessinsider.com/the-sleep-habits-of-ernest-hemingway-margaret-atwood-and-other-famous-writers-2015-10

https://www.lifehack.org/677367/powerful-daily-routine

https://balancethegrind.co/daily-routines/

#CoachingConversations - #DailyHabits, #DailyPractice(s) - #buildingMuscles(#Mental, #Physical, #Emotional, #Existential/#Spiritual)

CJBS Leading Insights with Professor Yuval Noah Harari and Professor Jonathan Haidt 

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/11/emotions-empathy-compassion-limbic.html

https://pohsungoh.blogspot.com/2021/11/coaching-conversations-small-daily.html

#CoachingConversation(s) - #Lifestages #Tasks #Milestones #Responsibilities #Growth

#CoachingConversation(s) - #Lifestages #Tasks #Milestones #Responsibilities #Growth

Poh-Sun Goh

6 November 2021, 0622am, Singapore Time

In broad terms, we can observe three life stages, from birth, to death. This starting (birth) and end point (death) are immutable. 

In the first life stage, after birth, as human beings, we are dependent, progressively grow and develop physically, mentally, and emotionally; within a family/community setting. [We will leave aside for future exploration scenarios where this ideal state is disrupted, in settings of war, conflict, being orphaned, etc]. We transition from family, through formal education, being progressively socialised. At some point, after exploring and discovering one's strengths and interests, preparing to live independently, make a living (including developing and training to perform socially and economically valuable and value-add roles), and progressively finding purpose and meaning, to build a personal and professional identity - this task taking center stage (i.e. who are you/am I? Being able to honestly answer this question, informed by experience, guided training, personal reflection and insight, and coaching).

In the second life stage, we take on individual and additional social responsibilities - at 'work', with our social networks, and for many of us, our own family; including its attendant financial, physical, mental, emotional, social and existential/spiritual challenges (to continue to grow and develop), and opportunities (to continue to grow and develop). A learning and growth mindset, informal and formal learning and training, personal reflection with openness, and honesty, informed personal awareness and observation [of results and outcomes], feedback (which is unbiased, honest and for us/given with our interest in mind) and coaching are all enablers.

In the third and final life stage, as we progressively relinquish our financial, 'work' and 'family' responsibilities, there will be an increasing challenge to re-examine ideas of personal identity, life meaning and purpose, and exploration of roles in life, and living, beyond traditional ideas of 'work' and 'family'. Ideally, this individual, and internal 'work' and exploration is guided and driven by deep personal insight, on a foundation of honesty, openness, will to grow and learn, flexibility, adaptability and anchored by stability (physical, mental and emotional; not to mention spiritual and existential 'wisdom') and resoluteness.

Coaching conversations can help.

Coaching Emotions; Empathy, Sympathy and Compassion; Limbic Resonance; Affective Leadership

Google search for 'emotional coaching'

https://www.gottman.com/blog/an-introduction-to-emotion-coaching/

Google search for 'coaching for emotional intelligence'

https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/2019/12/20/why-coaching-is-all-about-emotional-intelligence/?sh=6ca7cd714e0a

https://coachingfederation.org/blog/work-with-emotional-intelligence

https://appliedsportpsych.org/resources/resources-for-coaches/improved-coaching-through-emotional-intelligence/

https://believeperform.com/how-emotional-intelligence-can-enhance-coaching-practices/

https://positivepsychology.com/coach-emotional-intelligence/

https://coachcampus.com/coach-portfolios/research-papers/emotional-intelligence-coaching/

Google search for compassion vs empathy vs sympathy

https://compassionit.com/2017/08/27/empathy-sympathy-and-compassion-whats-the-difference/

https://chopra.com/articles/whats-the-difference-between-empathy-sympathy-and-compassion

Jeffrey D. Empathy, sympathy and compassion in healthcare: Is there a problem? Is there a difference? Does it matter? Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine. 2016;109(12):446-452. doi:10.1177/0141076816680120 https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/0141076816680120

https://lynboyer.net/emotional-intelligence-3/what-is-limbic-resonance-and-how-can-leaders-use-it-2.html 

https://lynboyer.net/leadership-presence/executive-presence-in-the-extremes.html

https://lynboyer.net/connect-affective-leadership℠-for-effective-results

Coaching Conversation(s) - Small Daily Steps, Daily Habits, Strong Effects, Significant Impact

Coaching Conversation (s) - Small Daily Steps, Daily Habits, Strong Effects, Significant Impact

Poh-Sun Goh, 4 November 2021, 0603am

Consider, sleeping a little earlier, a little longer. To wake up fresher. More rested. To build the foundation for the rest of the stay. Begin your day by sleeping well. Longer. 

Drink more water. First thing in the morning.

Eat consciously. Enough. Watch timing. To perform better.

Get fitter. Keep fit. Build 'muscle' - physical, mental, emotional, spiritual. 

'Read'. Learn something new. Daily. To start your day. To widen your perspective. See with 'new' eyes. See more. Deeper. 

'Reflect'. Know yourself. Know the world. About life. A little better. Every day. Do this at the beginning, and end of each day.

Know why. A little better. A little deeper. Each day. What gives you joy. Happiness. Meaning. Purpose. Before considering what and how.

Learning. Sharing. Giving back. Serving. Helping others. Adding value.

Coaching conversations can help.

⬇

Always remember that the future comes one day at a time. - Dean Acheson

Its the little details that are vital. Little things make big things happen. - John Wooden

Nothing is particularly hard if you divide it into small jobs. - Henry Ford

Men stumble over pebbles, never over mountains. - H. Emilie Cady

Step by step. I can't think of any other way of accomplishing anything. - Michael Jordan

Be master of your petty annoyances and conserve your energies for the big, worthwhile things. It isn't the mountain ahead that wears you out, it's the grain of sand in your shoe. - Robert Service

The world is not moved only by the mighty shoves of the heroes, but also by the aggregate of the tiny pushes of each honest worker. - Helen Keller

The man who removes a mountain begins by carrying away small stones. - Chinese Proverb

Be not afraid of growing slowly, be afraid only of standing still. - Chinese proverb

Great things are done by a series of small things brought together. - Vincent Van Gogh

Success is the sum of small efforts repeated day in and day out. - Robert Collier

We cannot all do great things, but we can do small things with great love. - Mother Teresa

Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can. - Arthur Ashe

Active Reading, Scribbling notes in margins, Blogging

https://vstorereading.com/how-scribbling-in-the-margins-transformed-my-reading/ 

Mystic Microsoft: A Journey of Transformation in the Halls of High Technology By Kraig Brockschmidt (Google Books)

https://www.amazon.com/Mystic-Microsoft-Journey-Transformation-Technology/dp/1365297810

https://www.bbc.com/reel/video/p09qwdp6/playing-with-fire-the-millennial-movement-to-quit-work

https://www.ourrichjourney.com/blog/yolo-and-the-fire-movement-why-it-doesnt-work-yet

https://investmentmoats.com/financial-independence/yolo-lifestyle-slow-fi/

Thriving Meaning Purpose from Poh-Sun Goh

Big History

https://www.ted.com/talks/david_christian_the_history_of_our_world_in_18_minutes

From Black Land To Fifth Sun: The Science Of Sacred Sites by Brain Fagan

From Black Land to Fifth Sun: The Science of Sacred Sites. Brian Fagan (book review)

"Sleep is your superpower ..."

https://www.ted.com/talks/matt_walker_sleep_is_your_superpower?language=en 

Matthew Walker: Why Is It Essential To Make Time For Sleep?

https://news.berkeley.edu/2019/05/13/walker-tedtalk/

https://news.berkeley.edu/2018/08/14/sleep-viral-loneliness/

https://news.berkeley.edu/2017/10/17/whywesleep/

https://www.gatesnotes.com/Books/Why-We-Sleep

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matthew_Walker_(scientist)

https://cnalifestyle.channelnewsasia.com/wellness/the-pandemic-messed-with-your-sleep-here-s-how-to-feel-rested-again-249736

https://www.channelnewsasia.com/commentary/sleep-loss-overworked-healthcare-paramedic-empathy-2277546

https://cnalifestyle.channelnewsasia.com/wellness/you-can-break-the-cycle-of-insomnia-without-long-term-medication-187146

https://cnalifestyle.channelnewsasia.com/wellness/coffee-tiredness-sleep-279031

https://cnalifestyle.channelnewsasia.com/wellness/singapore-most-fatigued-country-world-we-are-tired-278311

https://www.cdc.gov/niosh/work-hour-training-for-nurses/longhours/mod2/11.html

https://www.livescience.com/5269-study-sleepy.html

https://www.sciencealert.com/humans-used-to-sleep-in-two-shifts-maybe-we-should-again

Cousins, J.N., Leong, R.L.F., Jamaluddin, S.A. et al. Splitting sleep between the night and a daytime nap reduces homeostatic sleep pressure and enhances long-term memory. Sci Rep 11, 5275 (2021). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41598-021-84625-8 https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-021-84625-8

Fang, Z., & Rao, H. (2017). Imaging homeostatic sleep pressure and circadian rhythm in the human brain. Journal of thoracic disease, 9(5), E495–E498. https://doi.org/10.21037/jtd.2017.03.168

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5465131/

https://www.sleepfoundation.org/circadian-rhythm/sleep-drive-and-your-body-clock

Second round of individual (internal institutional) coaching for Year 1 students @ YLLSOM

Am starting second round of individual coaching for Year 1 students @ YLLSOM (Poh-Sun Goh, 3 November 2021, 0420am, Singapore Time)

Useful recap:

YouTube video- What is ontology? - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iE8Ek4xqSyw&t=93s

Web-post - Ontological coaching - http://www.newfieldinstitute.com.au/html/ontological_coaching.html

Linkedin article - https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/what-so-special-ontological-coaching-alan-sieler